Banger. #3, 4, and 10 are especially poignant. The era of political correctness and virtue signaling about doing good that makes things worse must end.
Wow, very thought-provoking article, Tim! As a therapist, I do feel compelled to address #5, lol. Yes, I agree that life is hard for everyone, and struggling is normal. I also agree that we should stop making it sound like there's something wrong with someone if they're having trouble with life issues. For labels, though, they can be helpful to some people. Like for me, and many other autistics and ADHDers, the label helps us identify challenges that we typically have, but most other people don't. Not because there's anything wrong with us, but because we're just built differently.
By having this label, it helps us find others with similar struggles, and we can giive each other empathy, social support, and even figure out strategies that work for us, rather than blaming ourselves when some mainstream strategies don't work for us. So in cases like this, labels are part of the solution rather than a part of the problem. (As a disclaimer, no, not everyone appreciates the labels of autism or ADHD, and I respect that. But for many others, we find the labels helpful and empowering, for the reasons I explained above.)
The other thing I want to mention, is that hiring a therapist, is similar to hiring a writing/ business coach. It is definitely possible for someone to figure something out themselves, or to journal, join free support groups, connect with trusting friends, read books on the issue, etc. But if you hire a therapist, it can save you tons of valuable time and energy, because the therapist (if they are good) would have the knowledge and skill to help you clarify the issues, find solutions, help you work through psychological barriers, etc.
Having a therapist also motivates you to take your life problems more seriously, because of social accountability, and because if you don't work on yourself, you will be wasting money. The therapist is a facilitator and guide, but the client needs to do the work themselves. It's similar to me hiring a fiction book coach. She's awesome and very supportive and knowledgeable. But if I don't do the hard work of actually writing and editing, then I would be wasting my money, haha. Hope this analogy makes sense!
Thanks, Tim! :) Imho, labels are just tools. Whether they are good or bad depends on how you use them. A label could be a cage that traps you, but it could also be a key that sets you free. Let's use the example of people who told you that because they have autism or ADHD, they can't write daily. I totally understand your frustration there, haha. The irony is that social accountability such as Write 4/28, is especially helpful for people with autism or ADHD. Social accountability helps everyone but is especially great for us.
So if someone thinks that due to being neurodivergent, they can't possibly succeed at their career, for instance, then that is a limiting belief that hurts them. However, if you instead see the labels as a source of information to understand your needs, then you can use that knowledge to help yourself excel!
E.g. I am extremely tuned into social support and accountability networks, because I know that makes me 100 times more focused, productive, and happy. Also, I spent a lot of time asking for information, because I know that the more information I have, the more reassured and confident I would feel to take action (or continue to take action). Many people believe that doing research is just procrastination. Yet, for an autistic, doing research paradoxically makes it easier for us to take action, lol.
We can also skip a lot of easy newbie mistakes because of the sheer amount of research we did beforehand. I did lots of research after posting my first Medium article. That research has saved me tons of time and energy, and it has ultimately paid off in my Medium and blogging career. Honestly I'm astounded how someone could post 20 Medium blog posts, get crickets in response, and never even try to get help...
"Too much education can lead to ignorance." - this reminded of what one very smart individual said to me about his college exams. He spent an entire night getting ready for an exam. He knew the subject but still felt he needed to grind. The result? He passed but got a low mark. His takeaway: Don't overdo studying.
If somebody writes a hit piece on someone whose content has helped me, it increases my loyalty to the person. I remind myself that hate comes from beneath and nobody is jealous of a loser.
Same thing with political correctness, shame, fixed mindset, victimhood, etc. It pushes me in the opposite direction than intended.
This ties into therapy culture. Give someone something to live up to and they will. Give them a negative label and it becomes a limiting factor in their identity. My father in law’s identity was a disabled veteran with depression and he lived without purpose, drank, smoked, and put on weight until his body gave out and he died at 67.
Martin Seligman wrote back in the 90s that the self-esteem movement of the 50s and 60s backfired and 10X’d the number of people with depression by the time they were in their 20s. It emphasized how a child felt over achievement and mastery and kids learned to ignore the insincere flattery meant to boost self-esteem.
Seligman argued that self-esteem was a consequence and not the cause of success or failure. He believed if children were taught the doing well side of self-esteem, then the feeling good side would follow.
Tim, you touched on important foundational truths that create stability for us. This flies in the teeth of numerous cults that are now proliferating. The article supports the maxim, “Pick your battles wisely, the win should forward your growth and true purpose and a loss should too.”
My favorite is #3. In a time when everyone and their dog think you can make things up by throwing some prompts at a fancy chatbot - authenticity is the real antidote.
Sometimes, I watch old Clint Eastwood movies just to escape the wokeness of modern Netflix productions.
Bravo Tim great piece! 7 and 8 for me. 7 because this is the way I try to live, 8 is spot on, I feel like our lack or purpose/meaning in life is the cause of our larger "metacrisis. I also resonate with 11, I teach yoga and sometimes during meditation I see people looking at their smart watches... I can only feel pity that they will sacrifice being right here and now to engage with the little digital golem on their wrist.
This was amazing. Ive stopped microlearning in social media and doubling-down on people who expand my thinking and healthy habits. I unfollowed over 300 accounts that were keeping me the same. More time in books. Less time with my head lowered down starring at a screen. I love your writing! Its inspiring me to be more myself. I feel like ive just been around the wrong people my entire life. Your posts are refreshing light of hope.
#7 - totally agree that the way many people live is making them sick and unhappy. And then we get told that there are new insights such as go to bed early / eat healthy food / talk to people etc... All back to what grandma/grandpa knew all along.
#11 - love it bc it's funny. I never go to Gyms, I hate them and constantly wonder why people run on a treadmill (instead of running in the forest (which I do)).... on top of it they do the machines while with their minds in their phones. You nailed it in a funny way. Enjoyed that one.
'...only to have the people on the ground intercept the money and use it to fund more terror.'
A very valid and concerning problem for sure. It definitely is a tough, tricky predicament in such circumstances.
I'd say that one main factor that helps enable such stealing of funds is if the culprit regimes have powerful foreign forces backing them and hence, are protected from interventions from international regulatory, peace-keeping bodies.
Banger. #3, 4, and 10 are especially poignant. The era of political correctness and virtue signaling about doing good that makes things worse must end.
It has to for sure Yuri. Do you align with Elon's comment that "pretending to do good while doing evil" is the worst? (Like what he says Disney does)
Or is Elon way off?
Elon is a horrible person to use in this example. He’s an “installed” fake himself. So, yes, he’s way off.
BTW, I enjoyed your article here. Well done. 👍
He is spot on. DIE and ESG are prime examples of that. https://yuribezmenov.substack.com/p/how-to-raise-your-esg-score
Dark truth #12: a Magnum ice cream gives you a few moments of pleasure followed by a feeling of sickly sweet nausea and a reduced bank balance.
#7 was the best. I enjoyed reading these nuggets of wisdom in an entertaining package.
Haha cheers.
#4. So much evil done in the name of doing good. So much is performative.
Unfortunately yes Neil. Other than live aid can you think of any other examples?
This is so good. I will read it again before I go to bed tonight.
What did you like about it Kimberly?
The truths.
The truth is what moves us into the light.
And darkness is how we find the light
Kimberly, a fellow truth-seeker?
Yes truly
🫱🏻🫲🏽
Wow, very thought-provoking article, Tim! As a therapist, I do feel compelled to address #5, lol. Yes, I agree that life is hard for everyone, and struggling is normal. I also agree that we should stop making it sound like there's something wrong with someone if they're having trouble with life issues. For labels, though, they can be helpful to some people. Like for me, and many other autistics and ADHDers, the label helps us identify challenges that we typically have, but most other people don't. Not because there's anything wrong with us, but because we're just built differently.
By having this label, it helps us find others with similar struggles, and we can giive each other empathy, social support, and even figure out strategies that work for us, rather than blaming ourselves when some mainstream strategies don't work for us. So in cases like this, labels are part of the solution rather than a part of the problem. (As a disclaimer, no, not everyone appreciates the labels of autism or ADHD, and I respect that. But for many others, we find the labels helpful and empowering, for the reasons I explained above.)
The other thing I want to mention, is that hiring a therapist, is similar to hiring a writing/ business coach. It is definitely possible for someone to figure something out themselves, or to journal, join free support groups, connect with trusting friends, read books on the issue, etc. But if you hire a therapist, it can save you tons of valuable time and energy, because the therapist (if they are good) would have the knowledge and skill to help you clarify the issues, find solutions, help you work through psychological barriers, etc.
Having a therapist also motivates you to take your life problems more seriously, because of social accountability, and because if you don't work on yourself, you will be wasting money. The therapist is a facilitator and guide, but the client needs to do the work themselves. It's similar to me hiring a fiction book coach. She's awesome and very supportive and knowledgeable. But if I don't do the hard work of actually writing and editing, then I would be wasting my money, haha. Hope this analogy makes sense!
I learned a lot from your reply Sieran. Thank you. Are there downsides to these labels?
Thanks, Tim! :) Imho, labels are just tools. Whether they are good or bad depends on how you use them. A label could be a cage that traps you, but it could also be a key that sets you free. Let's use the example of people who told you that because they have autism or ADHD, they can't write daily. I totally understand your frustration there, haha. The irony is that social accountability such as Write 4/28, is especially helpful for people with autism or ADHD. Social accountability helps everyone but is especially great for us.
So if someone thinks that due to being neurodivergent, they can't possibly succeed at their career, for instance, then that is a limiting belief that hurts them. However, if you instead see the labels as a source of information to understand your needs, then you can use that knowledge to help yourself excel!
E.g. I am extremely tuned into social support and accountability networks, because I know that makes me 100 times more focused, productive, and happy. Also, I spent a lot of time asking for information, because I know that the more information I have, the more reassured and confident I would feel to take action (or continue to take action). Many people believe that doing research is just procrastination. Yet, for an autistic, doing research paradoxically makes it easier for us to take action, lol.
We can also skip a lot of easy newbie mistakes because of the sheer amount of research we did beforehand. I did lots of research after posting my first Medium article. That research has saved me tons of time and energy, and it has ultimately paid off in my Medium and blogging career. Honestly I'm astounded how someone could post 20 Medium blog posts, get crickets in response, and never even try to get help...
"Too much education can lead to ignorance." - this reminded of what one very smart individual said to me about his college exams. He spent an entire night getting ready for an exam. He knew the subject but still felt he needed to grind. The result? He passed but got a low mark. His takeaway: Don't overdo studying.
If somebody writes a hit piece on someone whose content has helped me, it increases my loyalty to the person. I remind myself that hate comes from beneath and nobody is jealous of a loser.
Same thing with political correctness, shame, fixed mindset, victimhood, etc. It pushes me in the opposite direction than intended.
This ties into therapy culture. Give someone something to live up to and they will. Give them a negative label and it becomes a limiting factor in their identity. My father in law’s identity was a disabled veteran with depression and he lived without purpose, drank, smoked, and put on weight until his body gave out and he died at 67.
Martin Seligman wrote back in the 90s that the self-esteem movement of the 50s and 60s backfired and 10X’d the number of people with depression by the time they were in their 20s. It emphasized how a child felt over achievement and mastery and kids learned to ignore the insincere flattery meant to boost self-esteem.
Seligman argued that self-esteem was a consequence and not the cause of success or failure. He believed if children were taught the doing well side of self-esteem, then the feeling good side would follow.
#11... Damn!
I see this every time I go to the gym. It's sad to see people cannot stay off their phones.
I've come to realize phones are like a drug. But since the side-effects are not so apparent (like someone using crack), people don't see the problem.
Sad times ahead.
Tim, you touched on important foundational truths that create stability for us. This flies in the teeth of numerous cults that are now proliferating. The article supports the maxim, “Pick your battles wisely, the win should forward your growth and true purpose and a loss should too.”
My favorite is #3. In a time when everyone and their dog think you can make things up by throwing some prompts at a fancy chatbot - authenticity is the real antidote.
Sometimes, I watch old Clint Eastwood movies just to escape the wokeness of modern Netflix productions.
Bravo Tim great piece! 7 and 8 for me. 7 because this is the way I try to live, 8 is spot on, I feel like our lack or purpose/meaning in life is the cause of our larger "metacrisis. I also resonate with 11, I teach yoga and sometimes during meditation I see people looking at their smart watches... I can only feel pity that they will sacrifice being right here and now to engage with the little digital golem on their wrist.
This was amazing. Ive stopped microlearning in social media and doubling-down on people who expand my thinking and healthy habits. I unfollowed over 300 accounts that were keeping me the same. More time in books. Less time with my head lowered down starring at a screen. I love your writing! Its inspiring me to be more myself. I feel like ive just been around the wrong people my entire life. Your posts are refreshing light of hope.
Jessica, that's such a positive change! It's incredible how much influence the people we follow can have on our mindset.
Focusing on those who inspire growth and healthy habits can make a huge difference. Thank you for sharing, Jessica.
#7 - totally agree that the way many people live is making them sick and unhappy. And then we get told that there are new insights such as go to bed early / eat healthy food / talk to people etc... All back to what grandma/grandpa knew all along.
#11 - love it bc it's funny. I never go to Gyms, I hate them and constantly wonder why people run on a treadmill (instead of running in the forest (which I do)).... on top of it they do the machines while with their minds in their phones. You nailed it in a funny way. Enjoyed that one.
Great insights bro. I only wish my older friends whose flame has long been gone, could only understand what's going on in our world today.
Dave Medders
#8 is my favorite.
You are spot on with this one. That’s a great insight.
I've made this point many times in conversations with friends and on various social media platforms.
'...only to have the people on the ground intercept the money and use it to fund more terror.'
A very valid and concerning problem for sure. It definitely is a tough, tricky predicament in such circumstances.
I'd say that one main factor that helps enable such stealing of funds is if the culprit regimes have powerful foreign forces backing them and hence, are protected from interventions from international regulatory, peace-keeping bodies.