You’re Not Winning in Life Because of These Stupidly Simple Things
#1 – Unwillingness to look weak
Rockbottom is comfortable for many people.
They don’t dare get their life together. To change requires too much effort. It’s easy for them to fail at their goals and complain about it.
I’m no saint. I’ve done it too.
The times where a tidal wave has wiped out my dreams always came down to one of these stupidly simple things. Awareness creates armor against them.
Unwillingness to look weak
Mental health issues ruined a large amount of my life.
The trouble? I didn’t want to look weak. I wanted to look in control to my employees. I didn’t want my family to think they’d raised a weak piece of sh*t. I wanted my friends to think I was a successful music producer with two record deals.
The truth is I couldn’t eat. The thought of eating in front of other people scared me. Food problems and mental health issues equaled projectile vomiting.
My biggest fear was I’d vomit in front of other people multiple times. That disaster would then cause them to never talk to me again. Then I’d be alone. Then, what would be the point of living? Luckily I accepted my fate and decided to look weak.
A lot of people don’t. Tragedy strikes and they try and keep it together with fake smiles, fake dinners, fake instagram selfies, and fake friends.
All of us will be weak at some point in life. When you admit weakness you allow yourself to heal … then grow.
Scrooge McDuck Greed
Today I got an email asking me why I didn’t stake my Ethereum investment (similar to a term deposit). My rationale is simple: I’ve made 360% on that investment so far this year. Why would I take more risk to make a 368% return?
Human nature is to be drawn to greed. No amount of money is ever enough even though we tell ourselves we have a secret “fuggit all” number. During the middle of a pandemic the last thing you want to do is be greedy. There is enormous risk in both real estate and stocks as the disruption to the economy is realized.
You won’t win in life if you get greedy. Why? Greed means risk, and too much risk equals eventual ruin.
To win in life you need to be happy with what you already have. Everything else is a bonus. That mindset will cause you to outperform.
Fear of change
Most corporate jobs are spent arguing with insecure imbeciles who refuse to change. It’s a pain in the ass.
I’ve had full-time jobs where my entire day is spent holding the hands of adult babies who can’t understand that the internet has changed everything – and blockchain technology will change it all again. The rate of change in society is only speeding up. The ability to adapt is more important than a degree from a college that needs to pay their staff cappuccino bills.
To fear change is built into our DNA.
To embrace change is a proactive decision. Changemakers get all the rewards. They look lucky but actually they have simply decided to innovate even when there’s no need to.
A fear of change causes you to stagnate. Stagnation leads to survival mode. Survival can lead to all sorts of disappointments.
Don’t just survive.
Proactively embrace change through self-improvement. Change so much that you become unrecognizable to your high school friends. Change so much that your friends say “wow, you’ve changed so much since the start of the pandemic.”
Learners are the big earners of fulfillment in life. Choose to learn so you can change your brain.
Zero financial buffer
Money doesn’t make you happy. Sure. But money does keep you sane when tough times hit and you’re left with no job and no idea what to do.
I spent all my 20s with no financial buffer. I ignored stocks. I stuck my nose up at real estate. Basically, I spent every dollar of my paycheck as soon as I could. When I had to walk away from a business I loved, things got scary fast. An overpriced BMW became a boat anchor that dragged down my monthly bank balance.
A financial buffer isn’t about money. It’s about having danger money. Danger money reduces stress when black swan events like a global health crisis find their way into your life.
A good night’s sleep is massively underrated. That’s what a financial buffer gives you.
Takeaway: save up 6 months of income.
Too much consumption
It used to be just Netflix. Now we can stream HBO, Disney+, Hulu, Crackle, Amazon, etc. And the internet speed globally has increased due to high-speed broadband. Many internet plans don’t have data limits anymore. It’s a recipe for a new epidemic: overconsumption.
There is so much to consume. Your internet browser bookmarks are overflowing. You’ve lost track of all the people you follow on social media. Every business or individual wants you to subscribe to their work. There are useless newsletters clogging up email inboxes.
Lots of crying babies begging for attention. Not enough hours in the day to feed all the babies dopamine love hearts.
Simple equation: How many hours do you create versus consume?
The answer is scary. I tell myself I need to consume a lot of content to write. That’s a lie. You can’t win in life if you never create anything. Dial down the consumption.
No habits
So many people want to change their lives but nobody wants to change their habits.
– Lacey Abbacchhi
Habits tell you what direction to head in every day. Many people try to redesign their life with books, podcasts, gurus, and get-rich-quick schemes. Wrong.
The foundation of a good life is habits.
Don’t write out your goals. Write down the habits that support your goals. Start practicing those habits first. Once your habits are on fire you can use them to level up the areas of your life you want to improve.
For example I want to write better online. So I need to go back to the gym, meditate, read more, and eat a plant-based diet. None of these things have to do with writing. But they enable good writing.
You can’t write when you have low energy. Energy comes from good habits.
Choose habits that create energy so you can transform that energy into action against your goals.
Winning in life comes down to the tiny things that are easy to overlook.
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U came through with this one without making it too long or too much to absorb. To the point including sharing yourself; Good writing; good job.
Really love the punchy entertaining directness of what you write Tim. Writing is communication and you do that so well whatever your subject. Not a word wasted.