Thanks Tim. As one who is continually striving to be 1% better, I value the insights of those who are “making it”.
However, there are many people who are living happy average lives too. Maybe they want more or maybe they have decided they have enough. Either way, the continuous struggle to always aim higher is exhausting and can leave one depleted and feeling even more like a failure than before.
I am all for self improvement but I don't believe that is should come a cost of believing that you are irrevocably broken in the first place. As long as you are living the life you love and doing the renovations and upgrades to the areas that you are moved to improve, I see that as balanced living.
Just settling is never a good idea but aiming for someone else’s idea of success is not the best move either. The elites can teach a lot to those who want to go there but you definitely have to want to go there. Loving the life you have now even if it does not look like the world’s idea of success doesn’t make you an unmotivated, uninspired, boring average Joe. There is a lot that can be said for contentment and being at peace with your life choices.
If someone is bitter, complaining and critical of everything/everyone around them then they need to get up off their ass and actually do something about it. Either learn, grow, fix or go. Tearing down others who have done the work will never be the solution to their jealousy. Good lessons to remember. Thanks again, Tim.
There is an aphorism that says, "There is a little good in all evil." In other words, look for the good in a situation and you'll find it. Conversely, look for the evil and you'll find that. Whatever you look for, whatever you focus on, that's what you'll have, what you'll find.
It's one thing to despise a person, but never despise them because they've done well in the world.
SO TRUE! In a past life, I used to show French Bulldogs and years ago a new woman popped up at the big annual show with a lovely dog and won the whole thing. She was almost six feet tall with a perfect smile, great hair, slender and confident! A friend of mine said, mark my works, everybody will be hating on her. He was so right! One day I stopped one of her haters mid-sentence and asked them if they thought trashing her was going to make them beautiful, tall, stylish, with a billionaire husband and well-bred dogs that won. The trasher stuttered and stammered, and stormed off in a snit. I liked her, she was smart, funny, had good dogs and liked wine. We quickly became friends and are to this day over 25 years later. Side Note: She and the rich husband divorced 15 years ago or so, but she was kind to him and flew to his death bed and thanked him for their time together. Hand in the air, he left her enough so that she never has to worry about money again. She still inspires me!
It's tiring to always hear complaints or mocking when I throw a big challenge at myself. It always allowed me to grow in many ways. But people will say that I do too much, or that I'm a dreamer, or else.
It's good to read and know that other people love to be inspired and pull their game higher and higher.
Jun 23, 2022·edited Jun 24, 2022Liked by Tim Denning
The jealously and envy may come, not only from desire, but from self-limiting beliefs by someone that he or she cannot attain the success of an elite. However, I definitely agree with point 1. We can learn from everyone that we meet, and that's an empowering rather than limiting belief.
I would argue the root of populism is not jealousy. The root is mistrust of institutions and those who seek, not to just merely change things, but to centralize and concentrate power, influence, and decision making into the hands of a selected few on the justification that they know better. The justification is that this increasingly smaller, more centralized cohort is better qualified and informed, and "the masses" - bless their hearts - desperately need guidance.
It is not about celebrating "average" or "mediocrity". It is a critique of a viewpoint that holds in contempt those whose lives aren't enviable at present. It is about being condescended to, disrespected, and undervalued based on a personal judgment.
So where does this mistrust come from? That's the better question. Is it deserved, because those doing the condescending have proven themselves to be dangerous, manipulative, hypocrites who are actually self-serving? Or is the sentiment largely artificially generated by machinery that seeks to divide people, because they gain something from that? Or perhaps it is more benign than all that, and the mistrust is mostly the organic by-product of institutions failing to be transparent enough, while at the same time, making mistakes and not taking responsibility? Maybe it's some of all of that?
But don't give me a diagnosis of "everyone's jealous". Bullshit. Nothing's that simple. Also, I have a higher view of humanity than that.
I used to think that to openly admit that “I love people” and appreciate the “small miracles” in my life that I’d seem….hmmm….I don’t know kinda of mundane and boring? My cynical side got attention from others probably because I was playing small in life and made them feel better about their life somehow.
Today, like actually today, I love the whole of humanity in all of its mess and gosh darn if those little miracles keep showing up. Connecting with another human being or cat or bird is a gift of gold to me.
I’m not sure when my time in this body will be up but all I know is I intend to go out loving more people than I hate. This definitely includes myself!
A timely article! The world seems to be over run by arm chair scientists . It takes hardwork, perservance, and risk-taking to be the best in your field. Yes luck also plays a part but these elites had positioned themselves to use luck on their journey.
Some elites are arrogant, patronizing, and not folks I want to invite to dinner but I try to learn what I can from all of them. We are disadvantaged when we ignore their achievements.
I do my absolute best in everything I do but would never consider myself ‘elite.’ The dictionary definition of elitist is “one whose attitudes and beliefs are biased in favor of a socially elite class of people.” This definition infers, at least to me, that elitism is one step from fascism. One can be inspired, energized and proactive without being an elitist.
Yet another great article. I'm really loving your work. The hypocrisy in the "strive for mediocrity" mentality consuming so many of us when we all "want" acknowledgement or significance on at least some level is interesting indeed... How on earth can you achieve something great if you don't aim for the top? Quite often achieving something great comes down to a few simple things the most important of which is arguably keeping it simple and focused on yourself...
Hm! I get the "Why we shouldn't hate the Elite" argument, I really do. And really most of the time I go along with it. Many of these people have worked hard and became very successful and rich. I can even honour and respect them when I think running round a track constantly in training, or hitting a little white ball into a hole a couple of hundred meters away is bonkers
I even get that the media build up atheletes and winning sports stars, stars of stage and screen, politicians and business empire builders only to later knock them down, just to get eyes on the product their selling one way or another
But, when some take advantage of their "Elite" status by self selection and demand that everyone follows their rules set by themselves, which they publicly do not, when they fornicate, lie and cheat on the basis that they are the elite and don't have to follow the norms of accepted society, then it becomes actual "head chopping" time. Not that ever I would consider a certain UK Prime Minister to be the possible subject to a permanent haircut, or mention that just across the road from the entrance to Downing Street, outside the first floor window to Mansion House, on a scaffold, King Charles (known later as the First of that name) had his head parted from his shoulders on the 30th of January 1649. And with the now high cost of electricity, gas, oil and petrol, it looks like it is going to be a long very cold winter for many, many people. Jus' Thinkin' out loud!
Thanks Tim. As one who is continually striving to be 1% better, I value the insights of those who are “making it”.
However, there are many people who are living happy average lives too. Maybe they want more or maybe they have decided they have enough. Either way, the continuous struggle to always aim higher is exhausting and can leave one depleted and feeling even more like a failure than before.
I am all for self improvement but I don't believe that is should come a cost of believing that you are irrevocably broken in the first place. As long as you are living the life you love and doing the renovations and upgrades to the areas that you are moved to improve, I see that as balanced living.
Just settling is never a good idea but aiming for someone else’s idea of success is not the best move either. The elites can teach a lot to those who want to go there but you definitely have to want to go there. Loving the life you have now even if it does not look like the world’s idea of success doesn’t make you an unmotivated, uninspired, boring average Joe. There is a lot that can be said for contentment and being at peace with your life choices.
If someone is bitter, complaining and critical of everything/everyone around them then they need to get up off their ass and actually do something about it. Either learn, grow, fix or go. Tearing down others who have done the work will never be the solution to their jealousy. Good lessons to remember. Thanks again, Tim.
Truer words have never been spoken Dale
There is an aphorism that says, "There is a little good in all evil." In other words, look for the good in a situation and you'll find it. Conversely, look for the evil and you'll find that. Whatever you look for, whatever you focus on, that's what you'll have, what you'll find.
It's one thing to despise a person, but never despise them because they've done well in the world.
Love that Lou
SO TRUE! In a past life, I used to show French Bulldogs and years ago a new woman popped up at the big annual show with a lovely dog and won the whole thing. She was almost six feet tall with a perfect smile, great hair, slender and confident! A friend of mine said, mark my works, everybody will be hating on her. He was so right! One day I stopped one of her haters mid-sentence and asked them if they thought trashing her was going to make them beautiful, tall, stylish, with a billionaire husband and well-bred dogs that won. The trasher stuttered and stammered, and stormed off in a snit. I liked her, she was smart, funny, had good dogs and liked wine. We quickly became friends and are to this day over 25 years later. Side Note: She and the rich husband divorced 15 years ago or so, but she was kind to him and flew to his death bed and thanked him for their time together. Hand in the air, he left her enough so that she never has to worry about money again. She still inspires me!
Great story Kathy!
Thanks for this advice.
It's tiring to always hear complaints or mocking when I throw a big challenge at myself. It always allowed me to grow in many ways. But people will say that I do too much, or that I'm a dreamer, or else.
It's good to read and know that other people love to be inspired and pull their game higher and higher.
Aiming higher is good for the mind.
The jealously and envy may come, not only from desire, but from self-limiting beliefs by someone that he or she cannot attain the success of an elite. However, I definitely agree with point 1. We can learn from everyone that we meet, and that's an empowering rather than limiting belief.
Spot on Mark. We don't need to like someone to learn from them.
I would argue the root of populism is not jealousy. The root is mistrust of institutions and those who seek, not to just merely change things, but to centralize and concentrate power, influence, and decision making into the hands of a selected few on the justification that they know better. The justification is that this increasingly smaller, more centralized cohort is better qualified and informed, and "the masses" - bless their hearts - desperately need guidance.
It is not about celebrating "average" or "mediocrity". It is a critique of a viewpoint that holds in contempt those whose lives aren't enviable at present. It is about being condescended to, disrespected, and undervalued based on a personal judgment.
So where does this mistrust come from? That's the better question. Is it deserved, because those doing the condescending have proven themselves to be dangerous, manipulative, hypocrites who are actually self-serving? Or is the sentiment largely artificially generated by machinery that seeks to divide people, because they gain something from that? Or perhaps it is more benign than all that, and the mistrust is mostly the organic by-product of institutions failing to be transparent enough, while at the same time, making mistakes and not taking responsibility? Maybe it's some of all of that?
But don't give me a diagnosis of "everyone's jealous". Bullshit. Nothing's that simple. Also, I have a higher view of humanity than that.
I used to think that to openly admit that “I love people” and appreciate the “small miracles” in my life that I’d seem….hmmm….I don’t know kinda of mundane and boring? My cynical side got attention from others probably because I was playing small in life and made them feel better about their life somehow.
Today, like actually today, I love the whole of humanity in all of its mess and gosh darn if those little miracles keep showing up. Connecting with another human being or cat or bird is a gift of gold to me.
I’m not sure when my time in this body will be up but all I know is I intend to go out loving more people than I hate. This definitely includes myself!
A timely article! The world seems to be over run by arm chair scientists . It takes hardwork, perservance, and risk-taking to be the best in your field. Yes luck also plays a part but these elites had positioned themselves to use luck on their journey.
Some elites are arrogant, patronizing, and not folks I want to invite to dinner but I try to learn what I can from all of them. We are disadvantaged when we ignore their achievements.
I do my absolute best in everything I do but would never consider myself ‘elite.’ The dictionary definition of elitist is “one whose attitudes and beliefs are biased in favor of a socially elite class of people.” This definition infers, at least to me, that elitism is one step from fascism. One can be inspired, energized and proactive without being an elitist.
I like the way you address this issue, Tim.
Yet another great article. I'm really loving your work. The hypocrisy in the "strive for mediocrity" mentality consuming so many of us when we all "want" acknowledgement or significance on at least some level is interesting indeed... How on earth can you achieve something great if you don't aim for the top? Quite often achieving something great comes down to a few simple things the most important of which is arguably keeping it simple and focused on yourself...
😏
Hm! I get the "Why we shouldn't hate the Elite" argument, I really do. And really most of the time I go along with it. Many of these people have worked hard and became very successful and rich. I can even honour and respect them when I think running round a track constantly in training, or hitting a little white ball into a hole a couple of hundred meters away is bonkers
I even get that the media build up atheletes and winning sports stars, stars of stage and screen, politicians and business empire builders only to later knock them down, just to get eyes on the product their selling one way or another
But, when some take advantage of their "Elite" status by self selection and demand that everyone follows their rules set by themselves, which they publicly do not, when they fornicate, lie and cheat on the basis that they are the elite and don't have to follow the norms of accepted society, then it becomes actual "head chopping" time. Not that ever I would consider a certain UK Prime Minister to be the possible subject to a permanent haircut, or mention that just across the road from the entrance to Downing Street, outside the first floor window to Mansion House, on a scaffold, King Charles (known later as the First of that name) had his head parted from his shoulders on the 30th of January 1649. And with the now high cost of electricity, gas, oil and petrol, it looks like it is going to be a long very cold winter for many, many people. Jus' Thinkin' out loud!