Nobody knows what 'normal' is. The definition of this abstract term changes with time and depends on TV, President, new technologies, etc. Which leaves you no choice but to stay loyal to your own values.
I think I have been suppressing my weirdness unconsciously. More and more I feel like there's a switch inside of me that needs to be flipped to feel absolutely free. Like I'm living with the brake permanently on. But I'm trying to find ways to un-brake myself, to switch the flip - if this makes any sense.
I'm trying to be more present. Also taking meditating serious. I hope by getting still and present, I can 'unbrake'. Writing also helps ;) Thanks for reading and replying Tim!
Relate 100%. It's almost like as soon as you realize the brake is on, you spend the rest of your life learning how to drive again without your foot on the brake all the time
Can we talk about the whole "I make money online and don't feel bad about it" line? It's mind- blowing how many people WANT to make money online but they feel bad about it when they do? 🤯 Or question how others don't feel bad when you do make money online?
Also, I'm gonna say it.........Tim's not that weird 😁
Haha. I don't get it. It's like they need money to survive and will take any size salary, but they feel guilty making money online. Have you tried making money online Renee?
A lot of people try to be normal and a lot of people don't achieve much and it isn't a coincidence. Normal implies avoiding risk and is the surest path to mediocrity.
I have always tried to be different, not just for the sake of it but because following the herd isn't interesting.
Great job highlighting something significant that should be obvious to everyone but isn't.
Basically anything everybody else is not doing or it could also be not doing what everybody else is doing.
It didn't start that great. In eleventh grade, it involved dressing in outrageous colours like orange. A girl pointed and laughed and that was the end of that misguided phase.
In college, my approach matured and it involved not going to a movie just because all the cool kids were going instead of attending class. Even if 115 out of 120 kids bunked a class, I would be one of the 5 to attend it. Of course, the poor attendance discouraged lecturers from taking the class but I persisted in turning up.
I would also not go to the library just because all the nerds were going to get hold of a book that was in demand.
This made both the cool kids and the nerds ostracise me and I was forced to be a loner but I didn't care. Doing what I believed in and wanted to do was more important than the security of a social circle. This actually attracted only the people who genuinely cared about me and kept everyone else at bay.
After studying civil engineering, I became a software professional and that raised eyebrows everytime I mentioned it because people didn't know anyone else who had done that.
Even as a programmer, I forged my own path, following best practices when others would cut corners to get things done faster. This transformed me from someone expected to follow others' lead to someone who started setting the standard for others to follow.
That didn't prevent me from getting laid off twice. I then decided to take up writing while my peers still chase the 9 to 5. No matter how many times they get laid off, they aren't getting the message.
Of course, being different and better doesn't guarantee success but it still puts one in the best starting position.
Love this - my favourite people are always those who are somewhat weird and a little (or a lot) crazier than what "normal" expects them to be. :-) They are fun, with energy and a refreshing view on life. Too much normal sucks the joy out of everything.. Here's to unique weirdness that adds more colour to the world :-)
Vegetarian. Always struggled with the idea of eating cute animals for just that one meal but coming from a meat eating country it was very much the norm. Then I read the book ‘Under the skin’ and it hit me, I felt that the book put a mirror in front of me and that was it, not eaten meat ever since. Not missing it at all. A friend has once said to me that a vegetarian is a baby vegan so who knows ‘what’ I end up as..?! :-)
Yes yes yes. The best parts of my life have come from following my own stars, not somebody else's (with the profound exception of 50+ with my wife). Hurrah for weird, or at least different.
It's rare for someone to model such radical acceptance of their own uniqueness, and for that demonstration alone Tim you have my admiration and respect. You escape the norm not just on the weird side of the equation but on the scale of exceptional character as well. Bless your baby, your family, and your plants. I wish you continued success, you deserve it.
It is a quote from the Greek philosopher Socrates, in the age of Greek enlightenment, which encourages every citizen to examine their lives. Too many of us go through our lives without examining who we are and what we do.
Powerful message! This quote really sums it up: "The older I get, the more I realize it’s okay to live a life others don’t understand." RIP Anthony Bourdain, a complex soul who found himself through exploration. Love the idea of celebrating "weird" as a sign of authenticity. Life is too short to waste on chasing some imaginary version of normal. Be you, embrace your quirks, and own your journey!
Yeah I have so many minority identities that I couldn't be normal even if I tried. I'm gay, trans, nonbinary, on the aromantic and asexual spectra, autistic, an ADHDer, and many other things I won't mention.
While most people want a romantic relationship, I want a queerplatonic relationship, which most people have never even heard of, haha. But I usually don't mention it because it's tiresome to explain every time.
Even before I found out all my minority identities, I was already seen as the outcast in most social settings. :( On the bright side, in my friend groups now, normal is seen as a bad word. XD
I'm also insistent on the night owl lifestyle (for those of us who thrive in it). And I get most of my work done after midnight lol. Thank goodness for self-employment and getting to set my own schedule, too! I hate mornings and can't even rely on coffee due to medical reasons lol.
For me, labels help me find people with similar experiences. Not everyone with my label will have the exact same things, of course, but there will be overlaps and it makes you feel less alone! E.g. My being autistic and having a lot of sensory issues with most clothing textures, which most people cannot understand.
Unhealthy obsessions with Computers, Writing, and Nature, simultaneously; managing to have a disorganized mess of a desk, yet still being able to find almost everything; using 2 different Linux distributions as my daily drivers; and some how managing to enjoy writing while having dysgraphia.
I'm weird. It's only now that I've started to embrace it. It has taken me years to slowly begin to remove the masks I wore to fit in, appear successful, and use to make people like me.
Nobody knows what 'normal' is. The definition of this abstract term changes with time and depends on TV, President, new technologies, etc. Which leaves you no choice but to stay loyal to your own values.
But how do you do that when society wants you to conform?
It's easy because nobody really cares what I do :)
I think I have been suppressing my weirdness unconsciously. More and more I feel like there's a switch inside of me that needs to be flipped to feel absolutely free. Like I'm living with the brake permanently on. But I'm trying to find ways to un-brake myself, to switch the flip - if this makes any sense.
What are you trying so you can fix this Marie?
I'm trying to be more present. Also taking meditating serious. I hope by getting still and present, I can 'unbrake'. Writing also helps ;) Thanks for reading and replying Tim!
Relate 100%. It's almost like as soon as you realize the brake is on, you spend the rest of your life learning how to drive again without your foot on the brake all the time
Renee why would you drive your life with the brake on?
Can we talk about the whole "I make money online and don't feel bad about it" line? It's mind- blowing how many people WANT to make money online but they feel bad about it when they do? 🤯 Or question how others don't feel bad when you do make money online?
Also, I'm gonna say it.........Tim's not that weird 😁
Haha. I don't get it. It's like they need money to survive and will take any size salary, but they feel guilty making money online. Have you tried making money online Renee?
A lot of people try to be normal and a lot of people don't achieve much and it isn't a coincidence. Normal implies avoiding risk and is the surest path to mediocrity.
I have always tried to be different, not just for the sake of it but because following the herd isn't interesting.
Great job highlighting something significant that should be obvious to everyone but isn't.
What sort of things do you do to be different?
Basically anything everybody else is not doing or it could also be not doing what everybody else is doing.
It didn't start that great. In eleventh grade, it involved dressing in outrageous colours like orange. A girl pointed and laughed and that was the end of that misguided phase.
In college, my approach matured and it involved not going to a movie just because all the cool kids were going instead of attending class. Even if 115 out of 120 kids bunked a class, I would be one of the 5 to attend it. Of course, the poor attendance discouraged lecturers from taking the class but I persisted in turning up.
I would also not go to the library just because all the nerds were going to get hold of a book that was in demand.
This made both the cool kids and the nerds ostracise me and I was forced to be a loner but I didn't care. Doing what I believed in and wanted to do was more important than the security of a social circle. This actually attracted only the people who genuinely cared about me and kept everyone else at bay.
After studying civil engineering, I became a software professional and that raised eyebrows everytime I mentioned it because people didn't know anyone else who had done that.
Even as a programmer, I forged my own path, following best practices when others would cut corners to get things done faster. This transformed me from someone expected to follow others' lead to someone who started setting the standard for others to follow.
That didn't prevent me from getting laid off twice. I then decided to take up writing while my peers still chase the 9 to 5. No matter how many times they get laid off, they aren't getting the message.
Of course, being different and better doesn't guarantee success but it still puts one in the best starting position.
Love this - my favourite people are always those who are somewhat weird and a little (or a lot) crazier than what "normal" expects them to be. :-) They are fun, with energy and a refreshing view on life. Too much normal sucks the joy out of everything.. Here's to unique weirdness that adds more colour to the world :-)
Ps - ..and I'm with you on the animal front...
Good POV @MartiG, this is hard to criticize-except positively. Even critics will love this one!
Haha so true Myles.
Are you vegan Marti?
Vegetarian. Always struggled with the idea of eating cute animals for just that one meal but coming from a meat eating country it was very much the norm. Then I read the book ‘Under the skin’ and it hit me, I felt that the book put a mirror in front of me and that was it, not eaten meat ever since. Not missing it at all. A friend has once said to me that a vegetarian is a baby vegan so who knows ‘what’ I end up as..?! :-)
Yes yes yes. The best parts of my life have come from following my own stars, not somebody else's (with the profound exception of 50+ with my wife). Hurrah for weird, or at least different.
It's rare for someone to model such radical acceptance of their own uniqueness, and for that demonstration alone Tim you have my admiration and respect. You escape the norm not just on the weird side of the equation but on the scale of exceptional character as well. Bless your baby, your family, and your plants. I wish you continued success, you deserve it.
This comment made my day Rick. Do you always go around being this nice to people online? What inspires you to do it?
Yes, I guess I've gotten into the habit of this. Inspired by being over 60 and wasted time being too focused on myself to acknowledge the frickin' brilliant gifts of others. I've complimented you before. https://www.pivottothepodium.com/p/telling-stories-about-the-strengths
“The unexamined life is not worth living.” Socrates
I haven't actually heard this quote before Geoffrey. Can you explain it more?
It is a quote from the Greek philosopher Socrates, in the age of Greek enlightenment, which encourages every citizen to examine their lives. Too many of us go through our lives without examining who we are and what we do.
👍👍 for whole-food plant-based 🌱🟢
Are you on this diet Ryan? Does it make you feel better?
I never did a rigorous comparison about whether a vegan diet or omnivore diet felt better physically.
I _probably_ feel better physically.
And I'm almost certainly healthier overall.
But my reasons for starting it were ethical.
What has your experience been?
Normal means caring about what others think of you.
Stop doing that.
You wrote: I'm the weirdest dude you've ever met.
No, far from it.
I like weird people. Weird in a good way.
You wrote: as we age and follow routines, our perception of time speeds up.
One perspective on this is:
A day is a BIG part of your short life when you are a child.
A day is a SMALL part of your life when you are old.
Therefore, life feels faster when you are older.
Has your perception of time changed too Michael?
Powerful message! This quote really sums it up: "The older I get, the more I realize it’s okay to live a life others don’t understand." RIP Anthony Bourdain, a complex soul who found himself through exploration. Love the idea of celebrating "weird" as a sign of authenticity. Life is too short to waste on chasing some imaginary version of normal. Be you, embrace your quirks, and own your journey!
Did you ever watch his tv show?
Yep,AB Parts Unknown Hawaii—memories of carefree but serious living.
Timbo, you did it again!
Perfect title and post readers should take to heart.
Thought-provoking and great value to all poor normal humans who are trying so hard to raise themselves into nothingness.
Love the audio tag along with this post. Beats a long winded normal podcast any day.
Cheers Myles. How do you listen to the audio? On your phone?
II listen on my iPhone—very convenient and a treat—powerful medium here.
Thank you! This essay is so true and good nothing I say will do it justice. 💥🤯
Appreciate it Lori.
Yeah I have so many minority identities that I couldn't be normal even if I tried. I'm gay, trans, nonbinary, on the aromantic and asexual spectra, autistic, an ADHDer, and many other things I won't mention.
While most people want a romantic relationship, I want a queerplatonic relationship, which most people have never even heard of, haha. But I usually don't mention it because it's tiresome to explain every time.
Even before I found out all my minority identities, I was already seen as the outcast in most social settings. :( On the bright side, in my friend groups now, normal is seen as a bad word. XD
I'm also insistent on the night owl lifestyle (for those of us who thrive in it). And I get most of my work done after midnight lol. Thank goodness for self-employment and getting to set my own schedule, too! I hate mornings and can't even rely on coffee due to medical reasons lol.
Sieran, is there ever a point where it's all just labels? Sometimes I feel like a label seeks to define something that is often full of blurred lines.
For me, labels help me find people with similar experiences. Not everyone with my label will have the exact same things, of course, but there will be overlaps and it makes you feel less alone! E.g. My being autistic and having a lot of sensory issues with most clothing textures, which most people cannot understand.
Well, I must say, it's a very good thing I am anything but normal.
What makes you weird James?
Unhealthy obsessions with Computers, Writing, and Nature, simultaneously; managing to have a disorganized mess of a desk, yet still being able to find almost everything; using 2 different Linux distributions as my daily drivers; and some how managing to enjoy writing while having dysgraphia.
I'm about as odd as it gets.
I'm weird. It's only now that I've started to embrace it. It has taken me years to slowly begin to remove the masks I wore to fit in, appear successful, and use to make people like me.
How are you weird Landon?