Tim, you need to separate those things that are significant from those things that really don't matter. Put your energy into what is important and let the rest be. Fighting to open a bank account a few days earlier is so trivial. Understanding that we all have an expiration date is important. So is understanding that more than 90% of what we accomplish in life is truely meaningless and transient.
Wake up, enjoy a cup off coffee, enjoy the morning for just being. Very little really needs to get done and few will miss you when you are gone. Relax, build relationships, and help people. Don't make it a race, there is no reward for accomplishments in the next life.
RJA it's not about opening a bank account faster. It's about the fact that the default timeframe with most things is bullshit. That includes goals and careers. We're told to go slow and be patient, but I've found successful people are unreasonable enough to alter timeframes. Just look at Elon and what he did with SpaceX.
I’m glad things are working for you. I have a different perspective actually.
My mom died at three and I grew up with this urgency you are talking about. When I hit thirty, I had a big breakdown/breakthrough realizing I survived her oldest age.
I finally realized I had spent so much time running toward my goals that I had missed out on things that had mattered. I also had been making decisions in a dysregulated way from this urgency anxiety (I also have childhood trauma and CPTSD).
For me things have done a lot better letting myself have space, letting myself believe that maybe I won’t die in the next ten minutes and have to cram it all in.
Maybe different strokes work for different folks. Maybe it’s a balance. Maybe I just did the urgency thing too long and burned out. It is my default personally and it causes me harm so I have to intentionally go the other way.
Sofia, when you have a healthy obsession the idea of balance goes out the window. Especially if you want to be successful at something. I'm not interested in living a mediocre life. At the same time, you make some valid points. I hear the point on slowing down. The problem is most people slow down and never speed up again.
I think you're right Tim. Life is like a marathon. Each phase demands a certain level of speed to keep going. I believe there are time when we have to really push hard ahd fast too! And there are time when we really need to slow down a bit to catch our breath and then-pick up the pace again!
Sofia, I can TOTALLY relate to this! After my son died 3 years ago I went into the same mindset you're in. Slow TF down, take time to pause and REALLY ruminate in what you want out of life. Hustle culture is not one of the things I want. I'm not striving towards millions. I just need my version of success with heavy doses of joy sprinkled in there. We all have different bars we'd like to measure up to.
Sorry for your loss Kristi and thanks for sharing your story. I don't believe in hustle culture. It's a myth, an excuse. I'd even call it a marketing campaign.
I think loss of a special person is just awful to go through and really amplifies anything that feels bad. Also I have seen over and over again how a teaspoon of urgency in someone grieving basically causes them to totally screw up whatever they are doing instead of quickly resolving at the proper time and it becomes a longer term problem to unravel the mess. Eventually if you are smart you surrender and let go and I think going slow is part of that. At least that’s where I am at. Great to connect Kristi.
This reminds me of the famous line from Rocky 2 "There is no Tomorrow!"
My real super power is my impatience. I can pull several all nighters if it means I can do something faster. I watch YouTube videos at 2x speed. And my PC cursor speed is at the fastest possible.
Tim, I'm 74 and retired my first time in my early 20s thinking, "why wait?" Glad I did. Retirement for me was respite and recovery from what shall remain unspoken.
Retirement was fun and lasted about a year until I was prepared to launch another business. 🤗
In lieu of waiting to retire, take a lot of time off focusing on self-care.
Then, get back on the horse and ride fast and strong.
Forget about trying to be perfect. That's a waste of time.
Thoreau who? 🤣 I've temporarily misplaced so many wonderful quotes while names are hiding deep in my subconscious. I'm grateful those memories are surfacing when most needed 👌
As someone who's doggedly biased towards action I agree with so much of what's in here! But I've found personally that there's a fine line between treating everything as urgent and taking feverish action, and rushing through life so quickly that you forget to pause and bask in the greatness of it all.
TIM: once again U come thru with the Heat. My Guiding Motto that has brought me any measure of Success has been: DO EVERYTHING NOW!! As soon as I think I want to put off something until another day, those words come crashing into my Consciousness. Keep slangin the Gospel, Brotha.
Nov 4, 2023·edited Nov 6, 2023Liked by Tim Denning
Someday = Never
This one specially got me. I always try not to say someday and instead hit the grounf running.
I remember when I started my writing journey a month ago I started my substack publication with 0 followers after starting medium with only 10 followers straight after reading one of your articles about benefits of writing online and praising substack.
Thank you Tim for trying to wake us up every time!
Nov 6, 2023·edited Nov 6, 2023Liked by Tim Denning
I think not bad. I'd be grateful if you have any feedback on my newsletters. I got one for a niche and one more broad (taking your advice for not having a niche 😅).
But making connections writing on the same field is a bit tough because the existing people who are writing on Tech and are famous they are quite closed circle, but I am consistently trying to show up on their Linkedin posts and their Substack articles in which they reply to me on (and I recommend their articles weekly).
Thank you Tim. Just one quick question. I don't seem to receive direct emails from people I subscribe to on substack, and it seems to me people prefer to not send their substack articles via email and they rely on the app? Is that peferrable for some reason?
For example I don't get your substack articles via emai.
Yes, that is true. I've learned that wherever you are and whatever your situation is in every given moment, you're meant to be in this place at this moment and experience what you're experiencing. This is just how life work...
Recently I got this kickass moment against the „someday“ approach from a talented writer... and then I took action, bought his course, changed my mindset - and an amazing door opened. Thanks for that, Tim!
You have become my "kick-in-the-ass", for which I thank you. All those years...and now it's move time, get out of my way, I finally know what I want, and I'm going for it, Covid-brain be damned.
My man Tim! Your writing cuts like a subtle knife! The world needs people like you; To unveil what the absolutes have extrapolated and turned into profit! Thank you!
Tim, you need to separate those things that are significant from those things that really don't matter. Put your energy into what is important and let the rest be. Fighting to open a bank account a few days earlier is so trivial. Understanding that we all have an expiration date is important. So is understanding that more than 90% of what we accomplish in life is truely meaningless and transient.
Wake up, enjoy a cup off coffee, enjoy the morning for just being. Very little really needs to get done and few will miss you when you are gone. Relax, build relationships, and help people. Don't make it a race, there is no reward for accomplishments in the next life.
RJA it's not about opening a bank account faster. It's about the fact that the default timeframe with most things is bullshit. That includes goals and careers. We're told to go slow and be patient, but I've found successful people are unreasonable enough to alter timeframes. Just look at Elon and what he did with SpaceX.
Yeah, we also see that the retirement timeline is 67 years old.
Successful people alter that and many are retired at 40 years old.
Retirement can be a nightmare too Yusuf. Most people don't know what to do with themselves.
This is soooo good and you've hit the nail on the head.
Thank you Kristi.
I’m glad things are working for you. I have a different perspective actually.
My mom died at three and I grew up with this urgency you are talking about. When I hit thirty, I had a big breakdown/breakthrough realizing I survived her oldest age.
I finally realized I had spent so much time running toward my goals that I had missed out on things that had mattered. I also had been making decisions in a dysregulated way from this urgency anxiety (I also have childhood trauma and CPTSD).
For me things have done a lot better letting myself have space, letting myself believe that maybe I won’t die in the next ten minutes and have to cram it all in.
Maybe different strokes work for different folks. Maybe it’s a balance. Maybe I just did the urgency thing too long and burned out. It is my default personally and it causes me harm so I have to intentionally go the other way.
Sofia, when you have a healthy obsession the idea of balance goes out the window. Especially if you want to be successful at something. I'm not interested in living a mediocre life. At the same time, you make some valid points. I hear the point on slowing down. The problem is most people slow down and never speed up again.
I think you're right Tim. Life is like a marathon. Each phase demands a certain level of speed to keep going. I believe there are time when we have to really push hard ahd fast too! And there are time when we really need to slow down a bit to catch our breath and then-pick up the pace again!
Sofia, I can TOTALLY relate to this! After my son died 3 years ago I went into the same mindset you're in. Slow TF down, take time to pause and REALLY ruminate in what you want out of life. Hustle culture is not one of the things I want. I'm not striving towards millions. I just need my version of success with heavy doses of joy sprinkled in there. We all have different bars we'd like to measure up to.
Sorry for your loss Kristi and thanks for sharing your story. I don't believe in hustle culture. It's a myth, an excuse. I'd even call it a marketing campaign.
I think loss of a special person is just awful to go through and really amplifies anything that feels bad. Also I have seen over and over again how a teaspoon of urgency in someone grieving basically causes them to totally screw up whatever they are doing instead of quickly resolving at the proper time and it becomes a longer term problem to unravel the mess. Eventually if you are smart you surrender and let go and I think going slow is part of that. At least that’s where I am at. Great to connect Kristi.
Sofia, thank you for you thoughtful insight. I do agree, one had to let go and let the process happen.
Looks like new friends have been made :)
Thank you for waking me up with this swift kick to the backside, Tim. 😄
Haha...I hope the foot in the butt didn't hurt :)
Not at all. 😄
Hehe
This reminds me of the famous line from Rocky 2 "There is no Tomorrow!"
My real super power is my impatience. I can pull several all nighters if it means I can do something faster. I watch YouTube videos at 2x speed. And my PC cursor speed is at the fastest possible.
Whatever it takes to go faster.
Thanks for sharing Tim!
Rocky is one of my favorite movies. Love the scene when he's out in the snow traning and chopping wood.
Tim, I'm 74 and retired my first time in my early 20s thinking, "why wait?" Glad I did. Retirement for me was respite and recovery from what shall remain unspoken.
Retirement was fun and lasted about a year until I was prepared to launch another business. 🤗
In lieu of waiting to retire, take a lot of time off focusing on self-care.
Then, get back on the horse and ride fast and strong.
Forget about trying to be perfect. That's a waste of time.
This reminds me of the Thoreau quote that the mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation.
I love that quote Cory
Thoreau who? 🤣 I've temporarily misplaced so many wonderful quotes while names are hiding deep in my subconscious. I'm grateful those memories are surfacing when most needed 👌
"This anxiety is free motivation." I need to memorize this line. Another excellent read from Tim.
Took me years to learn this Denis. A bit of anxiety is good for you.
As someone who's doggedly biased towards action I agree with so much of what's in here! But I've found personally that there's a fine line between treating everything as urgent and taking feverish action, and rushing through life so quickly that you forget to pause and bask in the greatness of it all.
Most of this is bred into us by society. We’re taught to live on “someday,” but never made to take action today.
TIM: once again U come thru with the Heat. My Guiding Motto that has brought me any measure of Success has been: DO EVERYTHING NOW!! As soon as I think I want to put off something until another day, those words come crashing into my Consciousness. Keep slangin the Gospel, Brotha.
Keep it up Tim 👍
Much love Jeanette!
Someday = Never
This one specially got me. I always try not to say someday and instead hit the grounf running.
I remember when I started my writing journey a month ago I started my substack publication with 0 followers after starting medium with only 10 followers straight after reading one of your articles about benefits of writing online and praising substack.
Thank you Tim for trying to wake us up every time!
I mean it Basma. Someday = Never
Don't fall for this lie.
How's your writing going so far?
I think not bad. I'd be grateful if you have any feedback on my newsletters. I got one for a niche and one more broad (taking your advice for not having a niche 😅).
I write weekly on both. I promote the tech one [https://basmataha199.substack.com/] on Linkedin [https://www.linkedin.com/in/basmamataha/] with daily posts as much as I can.
But making connections writing on the same field is a bit tough because the existing people who are writing on Tech and are famous they are quite closed circle, but I am consistently trying to show up on their Linkedin posts and their Substack articles in which they reply to me on (and I recommend their articles weekly).
The books newsletter [https://booksmixture.substack.com/] is getting much more traction but it's still a bit new (only started two weeks ago), I promote for it on X: https://twitter.com/basmamat199/
I also try to write on Medium consistently (in literally any random topic that comes to mind): https://medium.com/@basmataha
Would be grateful if you have any feedback on my newsletters/writing for me. I have sent you a DM on Linkedin. Would love to connect :)
Sorry for the long comment, and thank you so much for the reply!
2 weeks is early Basma. Keep going.
Thank you Tim. Just one quick question. I don't seem to receive direct emails from people I subscribe to on substack, and it seems to me people prefer to not send their substack articles via email and they rely on the app? Is that peferrable for some reason?
For example I don't get your substack articles via emai.
Everyone I know Basma sends their Substack via email, including me. Weird that you're not getting them. Can you lodge a support ticket with Substack?
Everything happens for a reason....
wait I think I would rephrase it to:
“everything that has happened led to where you are now”
it could be good or it could be bad, but moving forward, u can take steps to be where you want to be...
Sometimes where you are right now Akshay is exactly where you need to be. That's how I feel right now.
Yes, that is true. I've learned that wherever you are and whatever your situation is in every given moment, you're meant to be in this place at this moment and experience what you're experiencing. This is just how life work...
You got it Akshay
Recently I got this kickass moment against the „someday“ approach from a talented writer... and then I took action, bought his course, changed my mindset - and an amazing door opened. Thanks for that, Tim!
Gunnar, glad to see "someday" isn't holding you back anymore.
You have become my "kick-in-the-ass", for which I thank you. All those years...and now it's move time, get out of my way, I finally know what I want, and I'm going for it, Covid-brain be damned.
Glad you've made the shift Linda.
My man Tim! Your writing cuts like a subtle knife! The world needs people like you; To unveil what the absolutes have extrapolated and turned into profit! Thank you!
Appreciate the metaphor :)